It is normal for humans and animals to encounter things they are afraid of. When we mention being afraid of something, the most common are fear of heights, public speaking, and spiders. There are others of course and some that can leave people frozen in fear. Like most, I too have fears. But my greatest fear is the unknown.

As I enter this new stage of my life, I am reflecting on life events that have directed me into my now. I’ve experienced joys and sorrow as well as rare moments of exceptional celebration. In each instance, the majority of these moments have been planned. Not solely to keep organization, but to be ready for the just in case outcome. When you experience the worst case scenario of life more than once and within what seems moments of each other, you fear that it will happen again. And since we cannot foresee our futures, it becomes the unknown realm.

Emotional and mental stress is more detrimental than physical pain for me. I have multiple backup plans for this exact reason in my personal and career choices. I would do anything to avoid feeling lost in the unknown and would never wish this on anyone. Knowing this type of pain scary. Living with it is unacceptable. I deserve more out of life than just the typical 9-5. It has taken me a while to even acknowledge that there is an alternative way of viewing the unknown, and I’m still a work in progress at fulfilling this desire.

Recently, I was tasked with taking the CliftonStrengths assessment from the Gallup Group. For those that have not heard of this, the CliftonStrengths Assessment is supposed to uncover the one true you. Personalized reports and resources are shared after answering questions in a 30-minute assessment. The assessment measures your unique talents — your natural patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving — and categorizes them into the 34 CliftonStrengths themes. For my task, I reviewed my top five.

• Achiever
• Strategic
• Learner
• Discipline
• Developer

Each strength falls into one of the four domains – think strategically, build relationships, influence others, or execute tasks. I’m still learning about myself especially now that I’m truly an empty nester and testing a new level of life. As I try to see the positive side of my negative planning, I’m hopeful that this can be one of many tools to get me on the other side of my greatest fear.

Stay tuned as I explore my strengths.

–Kelli